I Am Bismark

hypothesis: my inability to meet women is directly correlated to the amount of time i spend on the fourth floor of the clyde building. and also maybe because i am using the scientific method to analyze picking up women…

e xperiment: after a good deal of time spent there, i have determined that the fourth floor of the clyde has absolutely no women i am attracted to. so, i will use it as a control case. the wilkinson center is a the main hub of campus where probably the most people pass through in a single day. i began my observations there.

observations: after one hour spent in the wilkinson garden court, i saw at least five attractive women. i compare this to the zero attractive women i have seen on the fourth floor of the clyde in the last two years.

conclusion: i need to get out of the clyde building if i ever want to meet women.

now that i know where attractive women are (and are not), my next experiment will be to actually engage in conversation with one.

i feel probabilistic analysis is in order:

• A - the case that i am in the clyde building.
• B - the case that i am in the wilkinson center.
• C - the case that i see an attractive girl.
• D - the case that i talk to an attractive girl.
• E - the case that the attractive girl talks to me in a positive fashion.

well, so far, we know these values:

• P[A] = .9
• P[B] = .1
• P[AC] = 0
• P[BC] = .99

if i had to guess, i would say P[D] = around .25, and P[DE] = .000001, but that might be a little high…

i think i saw this on XKCD once.